Something about wives

A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave.
The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, “Why did you have to die?”Why did you have to die?"
The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I've ever seen before.
For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?"
The mourner took a moment to collect him self, then replied,
"My wife's first husband."
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A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny.
The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned.
The husband was stunned for a while but then smiled
"It really works!"
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Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage, the "y" becomes silent.
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I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?"
She said, "Somewhere I have never been!"
I told her, "How about the kitchen?"
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We always hold hands.
If I let go, she shops.
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My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours
That was only for the estimate.
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She got a mudpack and looked great for two days.
Then the mud fell off.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, whom do you let in first?
The Dog of course...at least he'll shut up after you let him in!
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Women are unpredictable. Before marriage, she expects a man, after marriage she suspects him, and after death she respects him.
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There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much that he could go thru hell for her. They got married, and now he is going thru hell.
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A man placed an 'ad' in the classifieds:
"Wife wanted". Next day, he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing "You can have mine."
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When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife is.
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It's easy to tell if a man is married or not. Just watch him drive a car with a woman sitting beside him. If both his hands are on the wheel, you can be sure he is married.
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A man received a letter from some kidnappers. The letter said,” If you don’t promise to send us $100,000, we promise you we will kidnap your wife."
The poor man wrote back, “I am afraid I can't keep my promise but I hope you will keep yours."
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"What's the matter, you look depressed."
"I'm having trouble with my wife."
"What happened?"
"She said she wasn't going to speak to me for 30 days."
"But that ought to make you happy."
"It did, but today is the last day!"
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She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?"
Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in